Why do I spend so much time reading blogs? I love reading words. Bloggers like Emily Janette, Taylor Ann and Courtney Jane create new word recipes almost every day. I can just eat them up. I sit there, tasting and experiencing their thoughts as if they were mine. And they are.
Until I draw my eyes away from their delicious words. At that moment, my own thoughts roller-coaster into my head. I quickly realize that I am not Taylor Ann, C. Jane, or Emily Janette. I am Jenny. My thoughts swim too quickly to be caught and made into a delicious recipe of words.
I am Jenny the wanna-be-blogger-with thoughts that swim too fast, and a life that doesn't slow down. Despite my speed, I must put down my thoughts and make them into something - mush(a soft or soggy mass) or perhaps, someday, filet mignon. So here it is - mush. And it will probably always be mush. But it's my mush.
And that's what Jenny thinks.
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Night time
As I was flying over the US of A on my way to Delaware, I realized that I much prefer the night time to day time. But then I wondered, does that mean that I love darkness? Darkness isn't usually associated with goodness. Should I like night better? Shouldn't I like light? But then, I quickly had another realization. The reason that I love night so much, is that it accentuates the night.
The glory of the moon and twinkling stars wouldn't exist without the darkness of the night. Without the bad in our life, we wouldn't appreciate the goodness. Opposition is so frustrating, but oh-so important. So I am grateful for the night and its mystical darkness, that I might more fully enjoy the brilliance of light.
And that's what Jenny thinks.
The glory of the moon and twinkling stars wouldn't exist without the darkness of the night. Without the bad in our life, we wouldn't appreciate the goodness. Opposition is so frustrating, but oh-so important. So I am grateful for the night and its mystical darkness, that I might more fully enjoy the brilliance of light.
And that's what Jenny thinks.
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Flash
Whenever I watch musical flash mob videos like these
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SXh7JR9oKVE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7EYAUazLI9k
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tr-0n1oGG8E
I almost start to cry. I don't know why, but tears well up in my eyes, my hair stands up, and my heart pounds. There is something about music bringing the world together. Young and old, male and female, republican and democratic, etc. - All of them come together to create a magical moment. Someday, I will participate in one. And when I do, I know it will make a difference. It is the little, crazy joys - like flash mobs- that make life worth living.
And that's what Jenny thinks.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SXh7JR9oKVE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7EYAUazLI9k
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tr-0n1oGG8E
I almost start to cry. I don't know why, but tears well up in my eyes, my hair stands up, and my heart pounds. There is something about music bringing the world together. Young and old, male and female, republican and democratic, etc. - All of them come together to create a magical moment. Someday, I will participate in one. And when I do, I know it will make a difference. It is the little, crazy joys - like flash mobs- that make life worth living.
And that's what Jenny thinks.
Saturday, November 20, 2010
A Rose by Any Other Name
Three hours of pure emotion = BYU's fantastic production of Romeo and Juliet. The movement, the characters, the set - it was all so dramatically wonderful. I think I inhaled beauty.
After a discouraging week, I headed to the theatre by myself. The intense emotions refreshed my spirit and filled me with energy. Concerts, plays, musicals, anything where human expression is key - they all bring me great pleasure.
In my culture, the LDS culture that is, we emphasize the importance of moderation in all things. While this may be good when it comes to things like icecream, video games, or spending money, what would we do without those artists who are not afraid to express themselves way beyond moderation. Too often, I find myself holding back, fearing what other people think of me. But the reality is, how does one survive in moderation. If we refuse to be passionate, what is left in this world. Without passion, what are we? Humans monitor themselves and watch their steps. It keeps us so busy, that we forget the essence of who we are. We forget that there are real, passionate beings underneath our shell of self-consciousness.
That's what I loved about Romeo and Juliet. They didn't waste time watching their steps. They took risks. They felt so deeply and passionately expressed those feelings. And as a result, they gave life to the human beings in the audience. I am grateful for those artists who take risks and express. They make me feel real. I hope to be one some day.
And that's what Jenny thinks.
After a discouraging week, I headed to the theatre by myself. The intense emotions refreshed my spirit and filled me with energy. Concerts, plays, musicals, anything where human expression is key - they all bring me great pleasure.
In my culture, the LDS culture that is, we emphasize the importance of moderation in all things. While this may be good when it comes to things like icecream, video games, or spending money, what would we do without those artists who are not afraid to express themselves way beyond moderation. Too often, I find myself holding back, fearing what other people think of me. But the reality is, how does one survive in moderation. If we refuse to be passionate, what is left in this world. Without passion, what are we? Humans monitor themselves and watch their steps. It keeps us so busy, that we forget the essence of who we are. We forget that there are real, passionate beings underneath our shell of self-consciousness.
That's what I loved about Romeo and Juliet. They didn't waste time watching their steps. They took risks. They felt so deeply and passionately expressed those feelings. And as a result, they gave life to the human beings in the audience. I am grateful for those artists who take risks and express. They make me feel real. I hope to be one some day.
And that's what Jenny thinks.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Clara
Robert and Clara Schumann were a musical couple. They both composed, and Clara was a concert pianist. Unfortunately, Robert was mentally unstable, so Clara had to tour and give many concerts to earn money for the family. Robert also wanted children. So Clara also raised seven children and eventually some grandchildren. Clara was a strong, talented woman, devoted to her husband and children. In Robert's journal he writes of Clara:
"..to have children, and a husband who is always living in the realm of imagination, does not go together with composing. She cannot work at it regularly, and I am often disturbed to think how many profound ideas are lost because she cannot work them out."
I think motherhood is a worthy cause. I truly do, let's get that straight.
But as I read this quote, I thought about life in general. Too often, we find ourselves centered on work - housework, homework, workplace - work, work, work. With all of the to-do lists (trust me, I know to-do lists) and errands, it's easy to let profound ideas flow in one ear and out the other. Imagine the impact of 10 solitary minutes to think, to expound, to create. I think it could transform the quality of our lives.
At the end of my life, I don't want my head to be stuffed with brilliant ideas that I neglected to develop, share, or create. So, I will take my ten minutes and think. Thank you very much.
And that's what Jenny thinks.
"..to have children, and a husband who is always living in the realm of imagination, does not go together with composing. She cannot work at it regularly, and I am often disturbed to think how many profound ideas are lost because she cannot work them out."
I think motherhood is a worthy cause. I truly do, let's get that straight.
But as I read this quote, I thought about life in general. Too often, we find ourselves centered on work - housework, homework, workplace - work, work, work. With all of the to-do lists (trust me, I know to-do lists) and errands, it's easy to let profound ideas flow in one ear and out the other. Imagine the impact of 10 solitary minutes to think, to expound, to create. I think it could transform the quality of our lives.
At the end of my life, I don't want my head to be stuffed with brilliant ideas that I neglected to develop, share, or create. So, I will take my ten minutes and think. Thank you very much.
And that's what Jenny thinks.
Monday, September 20, 2010
Weak Things
Everyone is challenged on a daily basis. Setbacks are hurled at us in every direction. Opportunity for discouragement and depression abound. A combination of all of these hard things often make it seem as though we are weak. It is easy to feel weak-emotionally, physically, spiritually, or mentally - in today's world. After a long day, it seems as though the time gobbled me up. I wonder, how am I supposed to make it through several more decades when this one day kicked my trash? It is easy to say, I am weak. I read this scripture the other day:
"To their astonishment, the city of Noah, which had hitherto been a weak place, had now, by the means of Moroni, become strong...."
I thought for a moment, and then I decided that by the means of Jenny McKay, weak things will become strong. We are all weak in some way or another. The challenge is looking over these setbacks to find the strengths and talents that abound in each of us. If we could all be the means of finding strength in a time of trial, then we could conquer the world.
And that's what Jenny thinks.
"To their astonishment, the city of Noah, which had hitherto been a weak place, had now, by the means of Moroni, become strong...."
I thought for a moment, and then I decided that by the means of Jenny McKay, weak things will become strong. We are all weak in some way or another. The challenge is looking over these setbacks to find the strengths and talents that abound in each of us. If we could all be the means of finding strength in a time of trial, then we could conquer the world.
And that's what Jenny thinks.
Donut
A few weeks ago, in church, we sang a hymn. I know, it's hard to believe. And of course, some lyrics caught my eyes:
"May union, peace, and love abound,
and perfect harmony,
And joy in one continual round
Through all eternity."
I liked the imagery of joy being one continual round. Neverending. Infinite. Continuous. Joy. That is what life should be - one continual round of joy. Hardships abound, and errors constantly occur. But nothing gives us enough reason to live without joy for even one second. My choir director, Sister Hall, talks about how often she eats a delicious meal without really enjoying it. Life is full of rich deliciousness if we are conscious enough to notice it. Every moment can be joyful. Every bite of life is filled with sweetness just for our enjoyment. So often we forget that is what life is about. Life isn't about getting done. Life is about savoring every, last, joy-filled second. Life is basically an endless donut - a continuous round of joy.
And that's what Jenny thinks.
"May union, peace, and love abound,
and perfect harmony,
And joy in one continual round
Through all eternity."
I liked the imagery of joy being one continual round. Neverending. Infinite. Continuous. Joy. That is what life should be - one continual round of joy. Hardships abound, and errors constantly occur. But nothing gives us enough reason to live without joy for even one second. My choir director, Sister Hall, talks about how often she eats a delicious meal without really enjoying it. Life is full of rich deliciousness if we are conscious enough to notice it. Every moment can be joyful. Every bite of life is filled with sweetness just for our enjoyment. So often we forget that is what life is about. Life isn't about getting done. Life is about savoring every, last, joy-filled second. Life is basically an endless donut - a continuous round of joy.
And that's what Jenny thinks.
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